Self-Care
Self care isn’t about being selfish, it is about taking care of yourself. To be able to provide yourself with the ability to relax can help decompress your nervous system and soothe your tension. Many times we think that to relax is to have something extravagant such as a spa day, or treating ourselves to materialistic goods. Sure those things can be great ways for you to give yourself a day but I want you to really focus on the inner world. To relax is to be at ease. No worrisome thoughts, no fears, nothing but peace. How can you achieve this? Well find something you enjoy, like reading, taking a bath, anything. It has to be something you like. Once you have it, allow yourself space and time for it. It’s the little things that allow us to be at peace, so prioritize.
Today the video game I have been waiting for finally came out. Upon the release, the pressure I usually put on myself I cast away and instead just allowed myself to enjoy this game. Normally I hear in my head well what would this person be doing, or what should I be doing. That noise is a constant, and it creates anxiety and pressure in my life. I was able to tune it out and say fuck you, I don’t care what I should be doing or what others are doing. I am me, and this is what I want to do. I have to yell at times at those voices otherwise they create such enormous stress on me.
As soon as I was able to quiet them I played my game. A game from my childhood that I adored not only because of the story but because it allowed me to feel close to my sister and brothers again. It allowed me to really relax and remember the joy I had when we played this. Getting to chill out all day with one of my favorite games gave me gratitude for my siblings. It reminded me of our bond, and the closeness we have, and that all the silly nonsense that has happened doesn’t matter. What matters is us, and I am so happy I allowed myself to enjoy it. For anyone wondering it’s the final fantasy 7 remake, and I played that shit for 7 hours already. The only reason I stopped was to shower and write this. I’m going to go back to it as soon as I am done.
I was able to take time to care for myself. I looked inward even though I was playing something outside of me, and saw what I truly needed was family. Self care is about taking care of what you truly need in your life. Do you need deeper connections with people? Do you need to allow your mind to just wander today? What is it you need? That is how you take care of yourself, by listening. We are all in a rush to get instant gratification and push the envelope in whatever we do, but we forget it’s okay to take a day off from that. It’s okay to not learn something today. The amount of pressure you put on yourself is the problem, not others, not the tasks, but that inner voice demanding of you everyday. That harsh critic is nothing but a bully, and it can use tricks like comparing you to others or telling you how your failing or other lies to manipulate you. Don’t allow it to. It’s just noise, and it’s your choice whether you listen or not.
I know you might say well I have a lot of responsibilities, I don’t have the luxury of playing video games like you. Well let me ask you this, what have you done with your time? Did you scroll through social media for an hour? Did you binge watch a show on Netflix? Did you hang out with your significant other? Did you use the time you have wisely? Or do you just say you don’t have time because you don’t make self care a priority? Making time for yourself and your needs will allow you to care for your responsibilities much more proactively. If you don’t make yourself a priority then you will be living in a frazzled mess of a world where you are always rushing around taking care of this or that, complaining about how you have all these responsibilities, and are exhausted by the end of the day. I prioritize my mental health so I can give my full attention to those around me. Self care is a priority. Are you making it yours?
What are somethings you love to do? Do these things bring up feelings of nostalgia? Do they make you grateful for what you have in your life? How can you make time for yourself to relax? I challenge you to find one thing to do today, whether it’s finding 15 min to take a bath, or grabbing a cup of tea and a book and curling up in a chair. I want you to do something that fuels your inner sanctuary. Because taking that time to rest up, will recharge you so you can get back at it. Don’t let the outside world tell you what you need to do for yourself. Don’t let that inner critic beat you up for taking care of yourself. Push that crap aside and know you are worth prioritizing. Are you ready to relax?