Missing the way the world was
Since Covid hit it feels like the world has spun into utter chaos. It is like the universe hit a button and was like now it’s time we address every issue out there at once and restart. Which can be a great thing for progress and growth. I just miss the freedom the world had. Especially when it came to travel and outdoor festivities. Lately I have been feeling so antsy, and restless. I have been wanting to travel so badly my heart aches a little. Every year I am always traveling somewhere new, someplace different. But this year has been a lot of being stuck and isolating from others. That has been so difficult and it leaves me yearning for family so badly.
Even when the world was normal my family dysfunction was not. But as I get older the thing that matters more and more everyday to me is family. I just won’t settle for less then I deserve now, where as when I was younger I took what I could get. Even if it always took from me. Boundaries are amazing! I am just feeling super stuck lately. Anyone else feel this way? Like there is a huge loss? I miss music festivals and food festivals. I miss traveling to a foreign country and having a trip to look forward to. I miss excitement of parties and people. I miss the world turning. But mostly I miss the fearlessness the world once seemed to possess.
Now it feels like everyone has something when it comes to this “new norm.” People afraid to cough without being looked at, or sneezing. I choke on my water in public every single time and I start coughing. My anxiety kicks in because the stares you get sometimes. I just don’t like the shutdowns and the being tied down. It’s like all these restrictions are separating us and dividing us more. People are getting angrier and angrier, and any sudden movement and they will explode. Rage fills the streets, maintaining distance is creating walls. I miss hugging people. I miss shaking hands and embracing friends. I miss day trips to nowhere and exploring the world. I miss broadway and the city life, I miss so many things that I took for granted. The world is just not the same and you can feel it everywhere you go.
Listen I am not saying it’s doom and gloom and misery. There are certainly great aspects to this as well, but lately I have been missing things. How do you feel about today’s world? Shocked? Angry? Depressed? What do you feel has been the undertone throughout this pandemic? What are some of the things you are missing most? How are you coping with the loss of the things you miss? What helps you get out of the funk? Let’s hear it.
Today was at a 6. Another day of fatigue. Don’t know why. Ugh