Friending
Today I got to see one of my best friends and have a food coma and video game day. It was exactly what I needed. Spent the afternoon hanging out on the couch and playing lego Harry Potter. Do you have friends or a friend you can just put on your comfy pants with and vegge out with?
Friendships are crucial for humanity. They allow for connection, support, and whatever you may need. A friendship allows you to be authentic and totally yourself if you allow that level of intimacy. What do you look for when it comes to friends? As adults we all believe we are put in this weird box that leaves us finding it more difficult to make friends. Like as a child we go up to another kid in school and ask them to be our friend and bam you have made a friendship. You are genuine and honest which leads to sometimes long lasting connections, but as an adult we find the question preposterous. There has been a lot of times I have said straight out I want to make that girl my friend. Why because I enjoy their energy or company. Or maybe we have a lot in common. But then actually making them my friend is quite difficult since you can’t make anyone do anything. Haha.
But how do we build friendships as an adult? Did you know there is an app that helps you look for friends? For real I have gone on it and made a few friends. Some of them I still connect with from time to time but others not so much. Other ways would be joining groups for hobbies you like. You like drawing maybe find a group that likes to go out and listen to music and draw. Or maybe you start up crossfit. Whatever you like doing find others to share in the joy!
Friendships aren’t formed overnight. I use to believe they were, that getting close with others was this easy thing. But it’s not. There are layers upon layers to a person, and with everyone evolving and changing there is always something new to learn. So when making friends with others take your time. Meet them where they are at. Also make sure to establish boundaries or else people tend to cross them. It’s important for any relationship. Also don’t bottle things in, make sure you talk about your feelings. I had one friendship I took the blame for a lot of it and I owned up to my mistakes. The other person could not understand their own responsibility and kept trying to make it my fault. I did not allow that and am now distancing myself from them. Make sure you understand your own self in any relationship. Without it you may avoid conflict for fear of losing others, or maybe you allow others to blame you like everything is just you. Relationships take 2 people make sure you understand your part in it.
Other then that be yourself. Don’t be fake and like things because you want to be liked. Just be you, authentically, genuinely. The people you may want to like you might not but you will find others who think you are simply amazing. Don’t go out pleasing others just for acceptance. It gets you no where in life. I use to try to please everyone but found that I wasn’t happy in that. I wound up lonely, upset, and just down on myself. If you are just you thats all it takes.
Today was a 6 1/2. Just fatigued again all day. I’m tired of this fatigue already!